Working at Goldman Sachs as an analyst. It covers the challenges, rewards, and the hiring process. However, there are a few areas where it could be improved:
1. Tone and Style:
- The tone could be slightly more engaging and less formal. Consider adding more anecdotes or examples to illustrate the points.
- The style could be more concise, eliminating unnecessary details without sacrificing clarity.
2. Structure:
- The information could be better organized into sections with clear headings. This would make it easier for readers to navigate the text.
- Consider adding a conclusion that summarizes the key points and provides a final thought.
3. Focus:
- While the text provides a general overview, it could benefit from a more specific focus. For example, you could delve deeper into the challenges faced by analysts or the specific skills required for the role.
Suggested Improvements:
1. Introduction:
- Begin with a more engaging hook, such as a personal anecdote or a surprising statistic.
- Clearly state the purpose of the article and what readers can expect to learn.
2. Body Paragraphs:
- Divide the text into sections with clear headings, such as "Challenges," "Rewards," and "Hiring Process."
- Use anecdotes or examples to illustrate your points.
- Provide more specific information about the skills required for the role and the typical day-to-day tasks.
3. Conclusion:
- Summarize the key points discussed in the article.
- Provide a final thought or call to action, such as encouraging readers to apply for an internship or learn more about Goldman Sachs.
Additional Tips:
- Proofread carefully: Ensure there are no grammatical errors or typos.
- Use strong verbs: This will make your writing more engaging.
- Avoid jargon: Explain technical terms or acronyms that may be unfamiliar to readers.
By implementing these suggestions, you can create a more engaging and informative article that provides valuable insights into working at Goldman Sachs as an analyst.