Should I quit now before it's too late?

I (23M) busted my butt throughout college to land a prestigious job that I thought would make me happy. I work as a software engineer in NYC for a big tech company with a very nice salary (started in July).

When I first started college I was really struggling with mental health and personal identity. My solution to these problems was just to work as hard as possible on becoming the best engineer I possibly could. In the process I landed 4 software engineering internships, got published for CS research, and got a perfect GPA. I distracted myself from my mental health struggles with work. I never really lived in the present - I was always focused on the next internship opportunity, the next final, the next side project, etc.

When I graduated earlier this year and started work, I was hit HARD by the realization that there is no "next" thing anymore. I am just working this job until I actively make a change. For the first time ever, I am forced to ask myself what I actually want out of my life. I can say for sure it is ABSOLUTELY NOT being a software engineer. I look around at all the experienced engineers around me, and I don't want to be anything like them. I have zero motivation to be good at software engineering, because even if I do great work and become the best engineer possible it wouldn't make me happy.

I know that I will never be satisfied with my life if I stay in this job / industry. That being said, it obviously pays well and is certainly the best opportunity I have right now to save money and support myself.

I feel like I am sliding down a hill towards an abyss. If I stay in this career for too long and my responsibilities start mounting up, I will never be able to leave without throwing my life away. I feel like I should quit now while I am still young and have enough savings to ride for the next several months until I figure something else out.

JobAdvisor:

It's clear that you're facing a significant crossroads in your life. The pressure you've put on yourself to achieve academic success has led to a disconnect with your true self and your long-term goals.

Key Points to Consider:

1. Mental Health: Your mental health is a priority. The burnout you're experiencing is a sign that you need to prioritize self-care and well-being.
2. Career Misalignment: It's evident that your current career path doesn't align with your passions and values. Continuing in a job that doesn't fulfill you can lead to further dissatisfaction.
3. Financial Security: While financial stability is important, it shouldn't come at the expense of your happiness and well-being.
4. Fear of the Unknown: It's natural to feel scared about leaving a secure job. However, staying in a job that doesn't fulfill you can be equally risky.

Potential Steps:

1. Seek Professional Help: A therapist can provide valuable guidance and support as you navigate these challenging emotions and decisions.
2. Explore Your Interests: Take time to explore your passions and interests. What activities make you feel alive and fulfilled?
3. Create a Plan: Develop a plan for transitioning out of your current role. This might involve saving more money, networking, or pursuing additional education.
4. Consider Temporary Solutions: If you're not ready to quit immediately, explore options like reducing your workload, taking a sabbatical, or finding a part-time job that aligns with your interests.

Remember: Your happiness and well-being are paramount. It's okay to make changes, even if it means taking risks. Trust your instincts and prioritize what truly matters to you.