I can’t do this. Hats off to the rest of you who can actually grind 40 hours every week until you are old and broken. Nope-ing out!

I tried to do the right thing and work full-time. I have been at it been six months. But it’s just too much. I was able to for eight years just get by on a side hustle which brought in quite a bit, but I wanted to pivot to something else and actually use my degree. I finally landed a hybrid job, and I thought primarily working from home would be the trick but it’s still exhausting. Sitting at my desk for eight hours a day is better than being in office, but it is still quite taxing. I hate the endless meetings, corporate bullshit, subtle bullying over nothing because you realize other people are just as miserable as you and they’re trying to get out their anguish out in the wrong way, ego pissing contests, and then, when I finally get off at 5pm only having maybe three or four hours to myself. There’s times I try to push bedtime out but then if I don’t get enough sleep, the next day is going to be exponentially worse. There’s no winning. Working a full-time job… on one hand, if you want a good position, you’re supposed to be overjoyed and grateful that you beat out all the other applicants but also understand the corporation owns your mortal soul. Start a business and understand that most businesses fail and you will be working twice as much.

I don’t have the energy in me after work to be creative or pursue hobbies or meet up with friends the way I used to because I’m just so beat and exhausted and my job has taken everything from me. I find it hard to have empathy for others and be emotionally passionate and think about humanitarian issues that used to rev me up. It’s hard to even walk my dog. I sit like a lump in front of the TV filled with existential dread, wondering if this is what I’m relegated to for the next several decades. Sure, I could pivot to a company that is less toxic, but they will still be taking my most prized commodity: time. I’m thinking about the next day where I have to get up at the crack of dawn and do it all over again. Weekends are just too short now to really get much enjoyment out of them.

Don’t be fooled by the “40 hours“. Office hours are 8 to 5 so they squeeze in that unpaid lunch hour every day and considering the time it takes to get ready for work, drive in traffic, and we are easily at 55+ hours a week forfeited. This is inhumane. You can argue “get a job you love and you won’t work a day in your life“ but get real… That is not feasible for most people.

The juice is just not worth the squeeze. This was my attempt at Adulting and y’all can have it back. I thank God I never had kids because then I would be forced to do this every day, and by the time it would be over when I would be able to retire my body would be too broken and worn down to actually enjoy life. At age 70, my creative pursuits would be long in the rearview, and I would realize I gave up most of my time and energy in my vital years to get money so that I could be in the rat race and prove to people I have status and stuff and it would ultimately leave me with nothing, and now I’m about to die. Cheers for consumption and materialism. Experiences>things. I like to plan lengthy vacations overseas, in years past this has kept the spark in my heart alive and I realize to get that kind of permission from my company to actually use my PTO they would note my audacity in their HR records (if they were even to grant the request) and I would not be a “team player“ for actually wanting to use my vacation time. Yah fuck them.

I decided I’m resigning and going back to my side hustle one day a week and getting a part-time job where I only have to work two days during the week. I am fortunate that I also have family help so I am in a position to do this. I am just shocked that most of the world has to go through this. It has been eye-opening. This is no way to live. I do not know how you do it and I’m sorry. In the past when I would be applying for full-time jobs, I would think if only they accept me it would be my key to stability and happiness. What a stunning realization that it is actually a surefire way to rob you of all the joy in your life. I guess I am just too much of a free bird for this grind, but I feel like a lot of us have been tricked into thinking the American Dream is only possible if you forfeit all of your time and energy and so we just go along with this plan, and it is a huge fucking lie. Be careful what you wish for.

Jobadvisor:

I completely understand your frustration and disappointment. It's clear that the traditional 9-to-5 grind isn't working for you, and it's not working for many others either.

It's admirable that you're taking steps to prioritize your well-being and pursue a more fulfilling lifestyle. Your decision to resign from your full-time job and focus on your side hustle and a part-time job is a brave and wise one.

Remember, you're not alone in feeling this way. Many people are rethinking the traditional work model and seeking alternative ways to make a living while maintaining their mental and emotional health.

Here are some things to keep in mind as you transition:

• Celebrate your decision: You've made a courageous choice to prioritize your happiness and well-being. Celebrate this decision and the freedom it will bring you.
• Focus on what matters: Spend your newfound time on activities that bring you joy and fulfillment. Whether it's pursuing hobbies, spending time with loved ones, or traveling, make sure to prioritize experiences over material possessions.
• Build a supportive community: Connect with like-minded individuals who share your values and aspirations. This can provide you with emotional support, encouragement, and practical advice.
• Practice self-care: Prioritize your mental and physical health by incorporating regular self-care practices into your routine. This could include meditation, yoga, spending time in nature, or simply taking breaks throughout the day.
• Embrace flexibility: Explore flexible work arrangements that allow you to work on your own terms. This could involve freelancing, consulting, or starting your own business.

Remember, there is no one-size-fits-all approach to work-life balance. What works for one person may not work for another. The key is to find a path that aligns with your values, passions, and lifestyle goals.

You've taken a significant step towards a happier and more fulfilling life. Keep moving forward, and don't be afraid to embrace the unknown.