Alarming new research paints a heartwrenching picture of what it’s really like to be the ‘farmer’s wife’
Behind the picturesque scenes of American family farms lies a complex reality for the women married to male farmers, one filled with overwhelming responsibilities, emotional labor, and a unique form of isolation that researchers are only beginning to understand. An eye-opening new study from the University of Georgia pulls back the curtain on the mental health challenges faced by these women, revealing that their roles extend far beyond traditional expectations.
The study’s title, “A Great Life, if You Can Stand It,” captures the bittersweet nature of farm life for these women. While they deeply value their rural lifestyle and take pride in their contributions to family farming, they also shoulder tremendous burdens that often go unrecognized by the broader society.
Consider this: Most Americans know farming is stressful, and farmers face one of the highest suicide rates of any occupation. But what about the women who stand beside them? These women aren’t just supporting players—they’re juggling multiple demanding roles while serving as the emotional backbone of their families and farms.
‘Matter of national security that farmers survive’
Led by Anna Scheyett, a professor at the University of Georgia’s School of Social Work, the research team conducted six focus groups with 29 women married to farmers across rural Georgia. These participants, ranging in age from 25 to 72 years old, painted a vivid picture of their daily lives through candid discussions about their roles, stresses, and coping strategies.
What emerged was a portrait of women wearing multiple hats – and sometimes drowning under their weight. The researchers identified five major themes in these women’s experiences: everything, farming work, managing emotions, being misunderstood and lonely, and coping strategies.
“If we don’t control our food sources, we don’t control our health and safety,” warns Scheyett. “It’s a matter of national security that farmers survive in the United States. And one of the big factors in helping farms survive is women.”
The everything-but-farming role encompasses all activities that enable farmers to focus solely on crop production. These women manage households, care for children and elderly parents, maintain yards, and often work full-time jobs off the farm. As one participant starkly put it: “If it has to do with our kids or my household… that is 100% on me.”
‘He doesn’t look at the bank account’
Because farming is inherently uncertain—one bad frost can spell disaster for the season’s crops—two-thirds of the women in the study work full-time outside the home. This provides crucial financial stability and health insurance for their families, but it also significantly increases their mental load.
Yet despite this designation, these women are actually deeply involved in farm work too. Many drive tractors, help with harvests, and manage the farm’s finances. More than half reported being responsible for the farm’s bookkeeping, a task many found particularly stressful as they were often self-taught and carried the heavy burden of knowing the farm’s complete financial picture.
“He doesn’t look at the bank account … as far as looking at it on paper, what we have coming in and what we have going out, I carry that burden,” one woman said.
Perhaps most striking is these women’s role as emotional managers for their entire families. The study found they feel responsible for maintaining positive atmospheres while absorbing their husbands’ stress and negative emotions, supporting them through difficulties, and mediating tensions between fathers and children during stressful farming periods.
Coping with sadness
The study revealed a particularly poignant form of stress these women face: role isolation. “What a lot of people don’t realize is as a farmer’s wife… you can’t get off at 5 o’clock and go and hang out with your friends like ‘normal’… because it’s a full-time, seven-day-a-week deal,” one participant explained. As another simply stated, “It is really easy to get sad.”
The study revealed a particularly poignant form of stress these women face: role isolation. Unlike their urban or suburban counterparts, women married to farmers often feel fundamentally misunderstood by others who don’t grasp their lifestyle. Missing birthday parties, having disrupted holidays during planting or harvest seasons, and being unable to maintain regular social connections create a unique form of loneliness.
To cope with these challenges, these women have developed various strategies. Many turn to faith for support, with over half specifically mentioning the importance of their Christian faith. They also find joy and pride in their lifestyle, particularly in raising children on the farm. One wife noted how lucky she felt because “we live right here in the midst of it all, so there’s no life like it.”
“These are powerful, resilient women,” Scheyett says. “They are passionate about farming and farm life, proud of what their families are doing, proud of their kids, proud of how hard their husbands are working and how hard they’re all working.”
Interestingly, one common coping mechanism identified was the tendency to minimize their own contributions and challenges. One participant described herself as just the “gopher” despite managing bookkeeping and making all town-based purchases for the farm. Women frequently rationalized their husbands’ stress-induced negative behaviors by attributing them to exhaustion or external pressures.
‘If we don’t support these families, we’re in big trouble’
The study’s findings, published in the journal Rural Mental Health, have important implications for rural mental health practitioners and policymakers. Scheyett suggests several potential solutions, including using Extension services to connect women and reduce isolation. Another crucial need is addressing the scarcity of rural childcare, which is both hard to find and extremely expensive.
According to Scheyett, policies increasing access to quality and affordable care “would give the women a little bit of breathing space.”
At its heart, this research reveals a group of women who are vital to American agriculture yet often invisible in discussions about farming stress and mental health. “I ultimately would hope that people can move beyond whatever stereotypes they have about farming and families who farm,” Scheyett says. “If we don’t support these families, we’re in big trouble as a country because we won’t be able to generate our food.”
Paper Summary
Methodology
The researchers used a qualitative approach, conducting six focus groups in different rural Georgia counties. Participants were recruited through local farm bureau staff and had to meet specific criteria: being married to a farmer, living on the farm currently, residing in one of the selected counties, and being over 18. The 60-90 minute focus group discussions were recorded, transcribed, and analyzed using thematic analysis, with researchers coding the transcripts independently before reaching a consensus on major themes.
Results
The study identified five major thematic areas in participants’ experiences: (1) everything-but-farming roles, which included all non-farming responsibilities, (2) farming work, including direct involvement in farm operations, (3) managing emotions for the family, (4) experiencing isolation and feeling misunderstood, and (5) various coping strategies. The participants revealed significant stress from role overload and role conflict, particularly between their various responsibilities, and expressed a unique form of stress from role isolation.
Limitations
The study’s limitations include its geographic focus on just six Georgia counties and its demographically homogeneous sample – all participants were White, heterosexual, married women. The researchers acknowledge that experiences might differ significantly for women of color, LGBTQI+ individuals, or those in different farming arrangements.
Discussion and Takeaways
The research suggests that mental health practitioners need to better understand the unique challenges faced by women married to farmers and develop more accessible, appropriate interventions. The study also highlights the need for broader system changes, such as increased access to rural childcare and community education about farming life. The findings contribute to our understanding of role stress theory by identifying role isolation as an additional form of stress not previously well-documented in the literature.
Funding and Disclosures
The researchers reported receiving no outside funding for this study. The work was conducted through the University of Georgia’s School of Social Work and Agricultural Leadership, Education, and Communication Department.