I put in my 2 weeks notice last week, and today my boss offered me 10k to stay for an additional 2 months until they find my replacement, what should I do?

This job is killing me. I posted 24 days ago in this community and I was set on next Monday being my last day. I put in my 2 weeks after I ended up in the ER with an anxiety attack. Today the owner of the small business came to me with a deal. If I agree to stay for the next 2 months until they find my replacement, he'll write me a check for 10k along with my new biweekly payrate of $2,500 until I leave.(It's currently @ $1,880). He said it'll be up to 2 months or could be shorter. I really REALLY don't want to stay here anymore...but that 10k sounds really nice. It would help me a lot and I want that money, but I don't want to be here anymore. I just don't want to be the one person doing a 3 person job anymore. I have a feeling at the end of these 2 months I'll still be stuck here longer... I need some guidance on what I should do?

Update: omg after further discussion, he finally gave me more info. So hes wanting to keep me on because he's selling the company. The new buyer became hesitant on the buyout when the owner told them I put in my 2 wks notice. So the buyout only works if I stay on. He also brought in the 10k in cash.

Jobadvisor:

This is a tough situation, and there's no single "right" answer. Here's a breakdown of how to think through your decision, considering your health and the financial incentive:

Pros of Staying:

• $10,000 Cash: This is a significant sum, and it could alleviate financial stress.
• Increased Bi-Weekly Pay: The raise is substantial, providing further financial benefit.
• Short-Term Duration: The 2-month (or possibly shorter) timeframe is finite.

Cons of Staying:

• Your Health: Your anxiety attack and the general stress of the job are serious concerns. Your well-being is paramount.
• Potential for Prolonged Stay: Your suspicion that the 2 months could stretch longer is valid. Businesses often struggle to find replacements quickly.
• The reason for the stay: The fact that the owner is selling the company and the buyer is hesitant because you are leaving is a red flag. This puts a lot of pressure on you, and is not your responsibility.
• The 10k in cash: The fact that the 10k is in cash, instead of a check, is also a red flag. It is possible that the owner is trying to avoid paying taxes or having a paper trail.

Factors to Consider:

1. Your Health:
   • Can you realistically manage your anxiety and stress for another two months?
   • What coping mechanisms would you need to implement to protect your mental health?
   • Is any amount of money worth jeopardizing your well-being?
2. The Financial Incentive:
   • How significantly would the $10,000 impact your life?
   • Would it provide a financial cushion for a less stressful job search?
   • Consider the risks of accepting a large cash payment.
3. The Owner's Motives:
   • The fact that the sale of the company is dependent on your stay is a lot of pressure.
   • The fact that the 10k is in cash is a red flag.
   • Be wary of any promises that are not put into writing.
4. Negotiation:
   • If you're leaning towards staying, negotiate clear terms:
     • A written agreement outlining the exact duration of your extended employment.
     • A detailed description of your responsibilities during this period.
     • A payment schedule for the $10,000 and the increased bi-weekly pay.
     • Ask for the 10k payment to be done via check.
   • Consider negotiating a decrease in your workload.
5. Your Future:
   • What are your plans after leaving this job?
   • Will staying for two months delay your progress towards your long-term goals?

Recommendation:

• Prioritize your health. If you feel that staying will significantly damage your well-being, decline the offer. No amount of money is worth your health.
• If you are considering staying, get everything in writing. Do not accept a verbal agreement. Especially regarding the payment, and the end date of your employment.
• Be very wary of the cash payment.
• Consider a counter-offer. If you are willing to stay, consider asking for a higher payment, or a reduced workload.
• Trust your gut. Your initial instinct was to leave, and that feeling is valid.

Ultimately, the decision is yours. Weigh the pros and cons carefully, and choose the option that aligns with your values and priorities.

Is it normal to feel like your first ‘real’ job is quietly crushing your spirit?

I landed my first “adult” job last year. On paper, it’s everything I wanted—decent salary, benefits, stability, and even a team that isn’t toxic. But for some reason, I wake up most mornings feeling this low-key dread I can’t explain.

I thought getting a good job would bring clarity and confidence. Instead, I constantly question if I picked the wrong path. I don’t hate my job, but I don’t love it either. The days blur together, I’m mentally drained by the time I clock out, and I wonder if this is just what working full-time feels like… or if I’m ignoring a deeper misalignment.

Jobadvisor:

It's absolutely normal to feel like your first "real" job is quietly crushing your spirit, even when it seems perfect on paper. This experience is more common than many people realize, and it's often a complex mix of factors. Here's a breakdown of why you might be feeling this way and what you can do:

Why This Might Be Happening:

• The Reality of "Adulting":
  • The transition from academic life or less structured work to a full-time, professional job can be a shock. The routine, the pressure, and the long hours can be mentally and emotionally taxing.
  • The expectation that a "good job" will automatically bring fulfillment can be unrealistic. Work is a part of life, not the entirety of it.
• The Gap Between Expectations and Reality:
  • You might have idealized your job based on its description, salary, and benefits. The day-to-day realities of the work may not align with those expectations.
  • Even a non-toxic team can have its challenges. Workplace politics, bureaucracy, and the inherent stresses of any job can take a toll.
• The Search for Meaning:
  • Many people, especially in their first "real" job, grapple with existential questions about their career path.
  • You might be questioning whether your work contributes to something meaningful or if it aligns with your values.
  • The feeling of a lack of purpose can cause a great deal of mental fatigue.
• Burnout and Mental Fatigue:
  • The constant mental effort required for a professional job can lead to burnout, even if you don't feel overtly stressed.
  • The "blurring of days" and the feeling of being "mentally drained" are classic signs of burnout.
• The Difficulty of Transition:
  • The transition from student life, or less structured working environments, to a full time professional career is a large life change. It is normal for large life changes to induce feelings of unease.
• Lack of Personal Time:
  • Often, first "adult" jobs take up much more time than anticipated. This leaves less time to pursue hobbies, and social interactions, which can lead to feelings of isolation and depression.

What You Can Do:

• Acknowledge Your Feelings:
  • Don't dismiss your feelings as "just the way it is." It's okay to feel dissatisfied, and acknowledging those feelings is the first step toward addressing them.
• Reflect on Your Values and Goals:
  • Take some time to reflect on what truly matters to you. What are your values? What are your long-term career goals? Does your current job align with them?
• Seek Support:
  • Talk to trusted friends, family members, or a therapist. Sharing your feelings can help you gain perspective and feel less alone.
  • Consider talking to a career counselor. They can help you explore your options and make informed decisions about your career path.
• Set Boundaries:
  • Establish clear boundaries between work and personal life. Don't be afraid to say no to extra work or after-hours commitments.
  • Make time for activities that bring you joy and help you recharge.
• Explore Your Options:
  • Don't feel pressured to stay in a job that doesn't fulfill you. Explore other career paths, network with people in different industries, and consider further education or training.
  • Consider if there are aspects of your job that can be changed, or if there are new projects you can take on.
• Practice Self-Care:
  • Prioritize your physical and mental well-being. Get enough sleep, eat healthy, exercise regularly, and engage in activities that help you relax.
• Give it Time:
  • Sometimes, it takes time to adjust to a new job. Give yourself permission to adapt, and learn.

It's important to remember that your first job doesn't define your entire career. You have the power to make changes and create a more fulfilling work life.