My job offers “unlimited PTO” but using it feels like a trap

I work at a company that proudly advertises “unlimited PTO” as a perk. Sounds great, right? But in the two years I’ve been here, I’ve only taken 6 days off—because every time someone actually uses this “perk,” they get side-eyed, passed up for projects, or end up subtly punished.

There’s no minimum or required time off, no one tracks it, and there’s this unspoken rule that you should only take time off if it’s an emergency… or you’re about to burn out. Meanwhile, people brag about “not using PTO in 3 years.”

I’m starting to think the whole thing is a scam designed to save the company money and make employees feel guilty for taking a break.

Is unlimited PTO just corporate gaslighting?

Jobadvisor:

You've hit on a very common and frustrating reality behind many "unlimited PTO" policies. You are absolutely right to feel like it's a trap and potentially a form of corporate gaslighting.

Here's a breakdown of why your feelings are valid and what's likely happening:

Why "Unlimited PTO" Can Be a Scam:

• Lack of Clear Expectations: The absence of minimums or guidelines creates ambiguity and fosters a culture where taking time off feels like breaking an unspoken rule. Without a framework, employees are left to guess what's "acceptable."
• Peer Pressure and Culture: As you've experienced, a culture of presenteeism and "bragging" about not taking time off creates immense pressure. No one wants to be seen as less dedicated or a slacker.
• Fear of Negative Consequences: The "side-eyes," being passed over for projects, and subtle punishments you've witnessed are powerful deterrents. This directly contradicts the supposed benefit of unlimited time off.
• Managerial Discretion (and Bias): The implementation of unlimited PTO often falls to individual managers. If managers don't actively encourage or model taking time off, the policy becomes meaningless in their teams. Some managers might even view taking time off negatively, regardless of the official policy.
• Cost Savings for the Company: From a purely financial perspective, unlimited PTO can save companies money. They don't accrue unused vacation time as a liability on their balance sheets, and they don't have to pay out accrued time when an employee leaves.
• Shifting Responsibility to Employees: The onus is placed on the employee to decide when and how much time off is "appropriate," often without clear guidance. This can lead to anxiety and employees taking less time off than they would under a traditional system.

Is it Corporate Gaslighting?

Yes, in many ways, it can be considered corporate gaslighting. Gaslighting is a form of manipulation that makes someone doubt their perceptions and reality. In this context:

• The company presents a positive image ("unlimited PTO" = great perk!).
• Your lived experience contradicts this image (taking time off leads to negative consequences).
• You're left feeling confused and questioning your own need for time off ("Am I being unreasonable for wanting a break?").

This disconnect between the advertised benefit and the actual reality can be incredibly damaging to employee morale and well-being.

What You Can Do (Though It's Tricky):

Navigating this situation is challenging, but here are some potential approaches:

• Subtly Advocate for Yourself:
  • Start small: Take a day off here and there for personal appointments or mental health days. Don't announce it loudly, but don't hide it either. See how it's received.
  • Frame it as a necessity: If you need more time, you could frame it around preventing burnout or attending to a personal matter (without oversharing).
  • Lead by example (if you're in a position to): If you ever become a manager or have influence, actively encourage your team to take time off.
• Observe and Document: Keep track of instances where people are subtly punished for taking time off and who is taking time off without consequence (if anyone). This information might be useful if you ever decide to escalate the issue (though that comes with risks).
• Have Discreet Conversations: If you trust any of your colleagues, you could have quiet conversations about how they perceive the PTO situation and if they feel the same way.
• Focus on Your Well-being: Despite the pressure, prioritize your mental and physical health. Even if you can't take as much time as you'd like, make the most of your weekends and evenings.
• Consider Your Long-Term Options: If the culture around PTO is significantly impacting your well-being and you don't see it changing, you might want to consider looking for a company with a more transparent and supportive approach to work-life balance.

In conclusion, your feelings are valid. Unlimited PTO without a supportive culture and clear expectations often becomes a tool for cost savings and employee guilt-tripping rather than a genuine benefit. It's a classic example of a policy that sounds good on paper but fails in practice due to the underlying culture.