Here’s exactly what to do when someone is disrespectful to you, says a communication expert

From Brain Freeze to Boss Moves: How to Handle Workplace Disrespect Like a Pro

We’ve all been there: A colleague makes a snide remark in a meeting, or a manager dismisses your hard work with a personal slight. In the moment, you freeze. Your heart races, your mind goes blank, and it’s only hours later—while you're driving home or lying in bed—that you realize exactly what you should have said.

That lingering frustration isn't just about the comment; it’s about the feeling of losing your power. But communication is a skill, and like any skill, it can be trained.

Here is a three-step playbook to help you stay composed, keep your cool, and reclaim the narrative when things get disrespectful.

1. Train Like an Athlete

Quarterbacks don’t just practice perfect plays; they train for "off-platform throws"—learning how to deliver the ball accurately even when they’re being rushed or off-balance. To handle workplace tension, you need that same "muscle memory."

Try this "Helium and Roots" exercise for five minutes a day:

The Visualization: Imagine your head is a light helium balloon floating upward, while your feet are heavy roots growing deep into the floor. This creates a posture that is both tall and grounded.
The Stress Test: Stand near a wall and toss a tennis ball against it. As the ball returns at unpredictable angles and speeds, maintain that tall, rooted posture.
The Mix: Start speaking while you play catch. Practice talking with intentional speed and volume while your body handles the "chaos" of the ball.

2. Use "Transparency Phrases" to Buy Time

The pressure to respond instantly is what usually leads to the "freeze" or an emotional outburst. Instead, give yourself permission to pause.

Prepare a few Transparency Phrases—simple, honest statements that signal you’ve heard the comment but aren't ready to engage with it yet. Choose one that feels natural to you:

"I need some time to digest what you just said."
"That comment took me off guard. I’m going to think about that for a moment."
"I’m surprised by that. I’m going to sit with that for a second before I respond."

Pro Tip: Practice these phrases while doing the ball-toss exercise. When you catch the ball, deliver the line. It trains your brain to claim space even when you’re "under fire."

3. Reclaim Your Power with "P" Words

When someone is rude, they are often trying to derail the conversation or assert dominance. Don’t take the bait. Instead of getting personal, pivot back to the work using The Power of P.

Using work-focused terms like Procedure, Protocol, Paradigm, Plan, or Position acts as a professional shield. It subtly signals that their behavior is "off-task" without you having to stoop to their level.

The Pivot: "If we return to the plan we’ve developed..."
The Reminder: "Just to remind us of the protocol we are following here..."
The Reset: "Let’s take a step back and look at the process that brought us to this point."

When someone uses a personal slight, they’ve chosen to bully their way to an outcome. By anchoring the discussion back to professional terms, you gracefully expose their behavior as ineffective while demonstrating that you are the one actually focused on the goal.

Stop the "shower arguments" before they start. Practice your posture, memorize your pause, and pivot to the power words.